I haven’t updated in a while, because I keep putting it off. I keep hoping things will get better, but it’s very, very slow. I am able to eat now without lidocaine, although my taste buds are still messed up. Even my favorite milk chocolate Cadbury eggs don’t taste good, which makes me so sad. Coffee doesn’t taste good. Pretty much nothing tastes as it should. That makes it really hard to eat…which makes it really hard to get enough calories…which makes it hard to get my energy back. Ugh. I haven’t updated because I was concerned it would just come across as complaining, and I don’t want that. I’m struggling with contentment. I know the truth that my contentment is based on my relationship with the Lord and not my circumstances, but I’ll be honest, I’m really struggling with that right now.
Tom had to go out of town part of last week, so my mother-in-law flew up for the week. She was so helpful and it was so nice to spend time with her. Sage keeps coming out of her room and telling me that she misses Grandma. ❤️
I’m eating a little more each each day. I’m about 50% food and 50% liquid for my diet right now. I had 2 visits to the infusion center this past week for fluids and might go once more this next week if I need it.
I’m still on the same pain medicine, although I’m now able to drink through the day with out needing a lot of lidocaine. It’s hit or miss what will sting my throat or will be hard to swallow, so I am trying a lot of things.
My throat is getting better quickly. A few times today I was able to pick up a cup of water and drink without having to use lidocaine first! That is a big improvement. In addition to a protein drink today, I was able to eat some soup for lunch and a little bit of the Thanksgiving dinner that we had for dinner. The bites are small, and I probably ate a half cup total, but it’s something,
Yep…….it hurt. But I ate one. I have seen a little bit of improvement in my throat. I have been able to get down some tapioca pudding, mashed potatoes, a couple bites of meatloaf, and a few other things I can’t remember. With the exception of the tapioca pudding, it’s just a few bites and it all hurts to swallow, even with the lidocaine.
Tom and I started the day off at the infusion center. I got a couple bags of fluid as well as my monthly zometa infusion and faslodex shots. I also got some pain medicine which was a little stronger than what I have been taking and that was wonderful.
We are back from the cruise. I’ll write more about that later.
Last night we flew home and I was dropped off at the ER on the way home. I was too weak to get off the plane without a wheelchair. That was pretty traumatic for the girls, but there was no option. I was too weak to walk. I got 2 bags of fluid at the ER. A CT confirmed that everything is fine, except a lot of inflammation in my throat. I am still not able to drink anything or swallow a lot with out liquid lidocaine.
Tom and I go in tomorrow to see the oncologist again and I get my monthly shots and infusion. I’ll also get some more fluids when I’m at the infusion center. Along with the severe soar throat, I still have some mouth soars as well. The pain meds make it hard to function, cause a lot of twitching and random muscle movements. They make it impossible to make any sort of decision and make it very hard to parent without doing something to make things much harder than than already are,.
I decided to stay on the ship again today. My biggest concern is dehydration and since I can’t drink water without numbing my mouth and throat, it will just be easier.
Hello from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico! I stayed on the ship to rest, so here is the view from our room.
This cruise is very different for us because of the radiation side effects I am dealing with. My mouth sores are slowly getting better, but it now hurts to swallow. The ship Dr. said they can give me some IV fluids if and when I need them.
I have been in the room quite a bit. This blogpost has taken 30 minutes to write because of brain fog and involuntary muscle spasms in my arms and hands – I keep dropping my phone.
