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Workout Class AKA torture from my friend Shira

Now don’t read too much into the title.  By workout, I mean Shira told everyone what to do and I either did it slower than normal, with less weight than normal or changed it completely.  But I made it there (even drove myself) and made it through!  I am very excited.

One thing I didn’t expect was what the port felt like when I jogged.  It kind of feels like it’s bouncing or moving.  I ended up just gently putting my hand on it because it felt weird.  No pain, just weird.  Also a sports bra is the first thing to really annoy the port area.  It’s just tight and sits right on it.

Not what we expected . . .

I’ll be honest, Tom and I are very surprised at how my body has reacted so far to this first round of chemo.  We prepared for the worst and so far the worst has really just felt like the flu for a couple days and me getting tired really easily.  Praise God for these great days we have had so far!

While we are thankful for each and every day, we don’t want it give us a false sense of hope as to how I will react in the future.  I do know my dose goes up a tiny bit next round and my body will be a little weaker from the first round.  We are taking one day at a time and for today, I was feeling good enough to go to workout.  I might be resting the rest of the day, or it might give me more energy.  That remains to be seen.  One day at a time!  Every morning I wake up and lay there and ask myself, “How are you feeling?”

My head has been itching since last night, making it hard to sleep as I kept dreaming about losing my hair.

Our 6 year old is full of helpful ideas about losing my hair.  For example she told me if I lose my hair before Halloween I can dress up as a zombie.  Perfect!  She also told me she told her friends at school I was going to be bald but they didn’t believe her.  I told our 10 (almost 11) year old she could have my blow dryer and flat iron as soon as I don’t need them.  And our 7 year old doesn’t really talk about it.  I really have no idea how they are going to respond.  But I would guess it’s going to be with some tears.  I have no idea what my head looks like without hair.  It could be pretty ugly!  🙂  Even when I was first born I had a ton of dark hair.  I guess we will see soon!  I have a wig.  I have some hats.  I need to get a couple cute black or black design type scarves, but then I’m as ready as I can be.

My friend Donna is on call to help me shave my head as soon as the hair starts falling out.  Plus she has some great ideas on how to make it fun and I’m sure we will take lots of pictures.  I have no idea how I will actually react when that time comes.  I’m as ready as I can be, but I think that will really make it seem real.  The scarf, hat or bald head is just the look of cancer.  Right now I still look in the mirror and I look the same, for the most part.  I walk in the grocery store and no one would know just by looking at me that I have Stave IV breast cancer.  After the hair is gone, it’s just different.

Meanwhile, back on the ranch . . .

As for the rest of the family, Tom is working hard on a new menu roll out for next week and is looking forward to having that off his plate!

The girls are ready for Halloween this weekend and are excited to start piano lessons next week (with someone other than me as their “teacher”).

As for me, I just continue to thank God for each day and am trying to live in the moment, whether that moment be talking with a friend, dealing with a 6 year old’s tantrum, or watching my chef/husband run video conference calls from the comfort of our living room.

Today is the day the Lord has made.  Let us rejoice and be glad in it.  (Psalm 118:24)

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