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I haven’t written much lately, mostly because I’m afraid what I write will just come across as complaining.  I typed up my long list of complaints and frustrations and cried as I told my husband all of them.  He suggested I not post the list – lol – (which I was never planning on)  but it sure felt good to write it.

I know I’m struggling with depression.  There’s not much to look forward to, although I do see the end of chemo in sight and am very excited about that!  It’s not easy to get up every morning, not knowing how I’m going to feel and knowing that little things, like moving clothes from the washer to the dryer or untieing my shoes, will hurt.  I struggle to get past that.

I’m trying really hard to limit my time on Facebook (which is such a time waster for me) and instead trying to pick up a book, listen to music, read scripture, etc.

A few friends have really encouraged me to think hard about what I’m thankful for and to try and focus on those things, even if they are small.  So here’s my list for today:

  • I’m thankful for time with friends the past two days that encourage me and remind me that I do have hope and who try their best to encourage me and cheer me up.
  • I’m thankful for the AWANA Grand Prix this weekend at church (which honestly I usually dread because it seems to go on FOREVER).  The girls are very excited to race their cars and I know it will be a nice time to chat with other parents at church, which I rarely get to do.
  • I’m thankful for enough energy to go to Costco with my husband today.
  • I’m thankful for the chance to go to the gym this morning and “workout”, even if it’s 1/10 of what I could do 5 months ago.
  • I’m thankful for a Friday evening to spend as a family.  We used to NEVER see my husband on Friday evenings and this evening he is off, will be making us a wonderful dinner, and will be part of our family movie night.

I guess that’s it for today.  Thank you for praying with us as we travel this journey.

If there is something specific I can pray for you, please email me and let me know!

So much to be thankful for . . .

Jennifer

 

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