My fabulous head shaving party on Friday has come and gone. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to seeing my bald head in the mirror, even if people say I don’t look as different as they thought I would.
While I’m not ready to go out in public without a hat or wig, beware . . . if you scroll down I’m posting pictures of my newly shaved head.
This cancer journey definitely seems more real with this new look I’m sporting. I know it’s just hair. If I stop treatment long enough, it will grow back. I know that. It’s just strange. It’s a new normal that I’m not used to yet.
But back to the shaving party . . .
Meet Donna.
I met Donna at workout earlier this year. I’ve enjoyed getting to know her during our weekly torture and she graciously agreed to come cut my hair and shave my head when it was time. 🙂
We started off with a little hair cutting lesson for the girls. They were very excited. What other 6, 7 and 10 year olds can say they cut their Mom’s hair? Mine can! 🙂
Then Donna got to work with hairstyle #1.
And then she cut it shorter . . .
And then she just went crazy . . .
Then it was time . . . ready or not . . .
And just like that, my hair was gone. No tears but lots of fun and laughter. Just friends and family with me on this journey.
I know everyone says, “It’s just hair.” And yes, it is. But just hair or not, it was mine and it stinks that it’s gone. My head feels funny. I feel uncomfortable outside our home (but I’m not hiding. Don’t worry.) I know it will get easier as I get used to it. But when you’ve had something on top of your head for your entire life and now all of a sudden it’s gone, it just feels wrong.
Just a few days later I got my “hair” cut again as I went in to have my wig refitted and trimmed.
And this is my favorite hat so far . . .
This is my new normal. One day at a time. . .
I’m still feeling ok. I’m tired and have really bad heartburn, but I’m OK. Please pray for relief for the heartburn. Everything I’ve tried so far that has worked well in the past and that has been suggested by the Dr. has not worked, so hopefully we’ll move on to a prescription from the Dr. tomorrow. (Not looking for suggestions or ideas, just for prayer. Thanks.)
Thank you for sharing those wonderful photos of your journey. I see bald cancer patients every day at work and I am always amazed how radiant they can look when, like you, they truly shine from within. You look gorgeous! Just never go out without lipstick!!!! People will be so blinded by your great smile they won’t miss the hair. Xo
And earrings!
Oh Jennifer, you look as beautiful as ever. But I understand what you are saying – it has to be hard to get used to this new normal, especially since this is such a visible reminder. Prayers for you – relief from the heartburn, and the exhaustion. And whatever else may present itself. You are being lifted up in prayer throughout the day at our house. Xoxo
Thank you friend. Doing so much better this week. 🙂
Oh Jennifer,
You look gorgeous! What makes you look even more gorgeous is your strong trust in the Lord in knowing that whatever lies ahead you are in His hands and you welcome His comfort and peace. You are such an encouragement to so many. I am praying for you and your family. I love you!
Mira
Thanks! It’s still hard to look in the mirror, so I’m thankful for cute hats. 🙂
Oh Jen, I love how your beauty from the inside radiates to the out! I love you lady.
XO
Thanks Amanda. 🙂
Jennifer, you are beautiful. Love the hat..looks great on you..Praying for a remedy for heartburn and the exhaustion you are experiencingol. We continue to pray for you….We love you. Aunt Car
Thanks. Heartburn is doing better and I’ve found a few more hats so not I’m not wearing the same one every day. 🙂 Most of them are still black though. I’m going to have to branch out to other colors eventually!
Jennifer – Today is the first day that I actually got some facts on what is going on in your life through receiving your blog website. I (we -Randy and I)heard of your cancer a couple of weeks ago. Of course, when we heard, we were shocked and so saddened. You immediately were lifted up to the Lord and will stay on our prayer list until you are healed. Your blog is beautifully written and shared and your outer and inner beauty is such a testimony of your beautiful faith. Miss you. Praying for courage and strength.
Thanks Marcia. Miss you too. 🙁 Thanks for praying with us!
Oh, brave warrior…your face radiates all the more! Your life hid in Him is clearly seen by your lovely smiles. Such love surrounds you. May your Shepherd lead you this day supplying all your needs & quieting you with His love!
🙂 I feel like lights are shining off my head now. It’s such a strange feeling.
you are gorgeous inside and out and who cares its just hair you are more important that hair. Heartburn be sure you tell your Dr. I was on medication from my gastrointestinal Dr and they had to double the medication because heartburn was so bad. It sucks. You look stunning in that last picture with the pink shirt and the black cap. Stay beautiful. God has this
Heartburn is better and I’m ready with a prescription for the next round of chemo as it seems to come on the same day each time (at least so far)!
Jennifer I love that you made it a party and had fun with it. You are beautiful and one benefit is you will not have a bad hair day. Shake out the wig and go. No more hair dryers! I know that you would gladly wield a hair dryer everyday but there has to be some benefits. I love the hat I am sure your collection will grow. I am continuing to lift you up in prayer and I hope that you are able to find some relief with the Dr’s help for the heartburn.
It was either a head shaving party or a pity party. Glad I chose this one! 🙂
Jennifer… When I read what you are going through, memories of your mom’s battle with cancer, and Andy Hollywood’s battle with cancer flooded my mind. Oddly, those memories don’t bring feelings of grief to me anymore, because I remember the seven ladies who wore hats to church with Andy when she lost her hair… And your mom’s beautiful smile and amazing courage… And somehow, I feel as if God has them watching over you on this journey. You are young and strong… And medical technology has come so far each year. Your candidness during such a vulnerable time is precious. Many are agreeing in prayer… And I’m praying specifically that God shows His power and heals you in whatever way He chooses to – so that your precious girls will be able to share how they watched God’s mighty hand at work in their precious mother. Sending love and hugs… You look beautiful!
Thanks Marcie. I don’t remember the ladies wearing hats to church for Andy, but I can picture what the look on her face must have been when she saw them. 🙂 Thanks for the encouragement!
I feel like I’ve been transported back in time. Surreal! I love the way the girls and your girlfriends participated. That was very theraputic for your family. The night before my mastectomy, my daughter and I celebrated my last night “with the twins” with a steak dinner! It always felt cold to me, so I wore my ski cap at home. (not as neat looking as yours….I looked like a bag lady. I never took a picture, and all the days I spent in the hospital, they gave me a shower cap to cover my head. It covered better they my baseball cap. I’m sorry now. I haven’t even one picture….it was a testament to my battle. You look beautiful without the wig!! I think I was upset to loose my eyelashes and eyebrows. (Thank God for Cover Girl) I found my mascara in an old purse after chemo….it was petrified…..solid as a rock (hahahaaaa) You saved some hair, right? You are the prettiest cancer patient I’ve seen in a long time!! Remember….don’t dwell on what you’ve lost….dwell what you will gain. Laura Story says it best in the song “Blessing”. “What if trials of this life, are Your mercies in disguise.” I gained much richer and abundant blessings and I praise Him for it!! Prayers and HUGS Jennifer!!
Never thought have a party before surgery. I will have to start planning that one! You have good ideas! Keep sharing them please!!
I love that song, although last time I heard it I started to cry. Still love the song, it just takes on a different meaning for me now. 🙂
Jennifer, you are gorgeous. Love you, sweet friend.
Miss you. Hope to see you on Thursday!
Dear Jennifer,
What I appreciate about your journey is your transparency and how you are allowing your daughters (and family and friends) to be a part of every step. About shaved heads. When I see people who have shaved their heads, to me it seems like I can see into their soul easier…something about the absence of the hair. For me personally, other than having a very cold head at night ( I found some special cotton turbans for that), I honestly didn’t mind it!
Sending you love this day, SoSan
My head gets cold all the time! I was prepared for that because so many people told me it would. But so does my neck. I’ve always had hair covering it in the back and it gets cold. Guess I’ll be wearing a scarf more when I go outside!