2015 has come and gone . . .
It seems at this time of year, everyone is setting goals, looking ahead, planning for the year, organizing (or getting ready to), exercising, etc. There’s even this new “word of the year” thing going around on Facebook.
I’ll be honest. It’s hard for me to look ahead at the year. While everyone seems to be looking forward to seeing what the new year holds, I’m am sitting here wishing I could just fast forward to January 1, 2017. But since that’s not possible, I am just going to focus on today.
One Day At A Time
That will be my life and the life of our family this year.
The girls and I love taking silly pictures on New Year’s Eve. Tom . . . not so much.
That phrase came up multiple times last night as we spent time as a family and the kids asked what we would be doing next Christmas and New Year’s Eve.
Our 11 year old, especially, always wants to know what’s coming. “Will Mom still have cancer next New Year’s Eve?”
My response? “I don’t know. We just have to take one day at a time.”
In years past, I really had no idea what would come our way that year. But this year, that seems to be different. Unless something changes, I’m looking at a year full of chemo, surgery, radiation, scans and another possible surgery. The only way for me to think right now is to focus on what God has given me today, how I’m feeling today, what’s happening today, and trust that He has the future planned out and will be right there with me when I get there. If I look any farther ahead than today, I cry. Every. Time.
So today is Friday, January 1, 2016, 2 days after chemo. While I’ve had a ton of energy the past two days, that is now gone and I’m a bit achy and very fatigued. However, there is nothing that has to be done today, except pick up around the house, which will somehow get done by the end of the day. And if that doesn’t get done, oh well. (That is a big indication as to how I’m feeling as I usually can’t rest if the house is a mess. Today, I don’t care. I’m too tired to move.)
Matthew 6:25-34
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
One more fun picture from yesterday (when I had energy)
So much to be thankful for . . .
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I was surprised to find you are a breast cancer survivor too! I’m so thankful God allowed our paths to cross. I will be reading your entire blog tomorrow and I can’t wait to get to know you a little better. It’s nice knowing I’m not alone and I really appreciate being able to read other blogs from women who’ve “been there and done that.” It helps me know what to expect next. I’m stage 2B Invasive ductal carcinoma with metastasis to the lymph nodes.
Hi Bonnie. Wish I could say I am a breast cancer survivor, but I am only 3 months into my fight and am still working on killing it with chemo before we move on to surgery and radiation. So you are ahead of me in this journey! I’ve been so encouraged by your blog. Thanks for writing and being honest with how you are feeling. 🙂
It brought such a smile to my face to see that you had enough energy to go sledding with your family. More wonderful memories. I love the verses about not worrying about tomorrow…I tend to look too far ahead and start fretting before I really have reason! God is our ROCK and our REGUGE. That is all we need to know for each day. God bless you on this journey. We are here for you. Praying for you right now!!
Thanks for the encouragement Marcia. 🙂
Only just found out about this journey you are on! My daughter Heather asked if I knew. Contacted your Dad to see if he could give me any further information, and he was kind enough to give me this blog address. It’s a WONDERFUL blog, honoring to our Lord, as He upholds you through this journey. Lovely seeing your pictures of your family. (It was good to see the pictures of your Dad and Aunt Marilyn too)
€:-)
Please KNOW that I’m praying for you!!
Oh thank you Linda. 🙂 So glad you were able to chat with my Dad too. When he was up here last month, he brought up the diary my Mom had written on her trip back to stay with you the summer she met my Dad. It was fun to read. 🙂
Happy New Year to the family. Remain strong in our Lord Jesus Christ he is our strength. You are amazing how strong you are. Continuing with prayers.
Happy New Year to you and your family too Karyn!
Thanks for sharing. While my situation is different than yours my thoughts about the new year are similar. Was praying with the kids yesterday morning and trying to pray about the new year and all that it will bring (trying to be hopeful) and I just about broke down in tears. It’s not quite the hopeful new year that many anticipate. Similar to you, I was thinking that I would rather skip the next few months and just get to summer. Just need to rest in Jesus each moment and not think ahead too much. He will carry us as He has already proven to do. Continuing to pray for you.
I know it’s not the new year you would hope for. 🙁 I will continue to pray for you as well! So thankful He will be right there with us each and every day!
Hi Jennifer, thank you for the reminder we all need about only being concerned for today. None of us knows what tomorrow may bring but we act as if we do. One thing that I requested from In Touch (Dr. Charles Stanley’s web site) was a 90 days of gratitude journal. Thought it would be a good way to start the new year and even continue beyond 90 days: ) I fervantly ask for God’s great peace in your situation as I know it’s so difficult to face each day. You do have the greatest hope ever in Christ, hope that does not dissapoint and no one can ever take away. God’s richest blessings to you and your sweet family. Psalm 62:5
Thanks for mentioning the 90 days of gratitude journal. I love that idea and just ordered one. 🙂 Thanks for praying with us! 🙂
I know you didn’t feel very strong yesterday. You must not have let the children know it because it looks like they were having a ball. To protect your children from knowing how tired you really were, I will say you are one strong lady, who love here girls so very much. We pray this week you will have the strength you need. Please tell Tom hello from us and we are so very proud of him. Thank you. God Bless you Jennifer We think and pray for you daily. Take Care.
Actually, the day we went to the snow, I was feeling great. I think I got a boost of energy from the steroid they give me as one of my pre-meds. I was wired and actually had a hard time calming down and resting. The next day was the total opposite!!
Happy New Year Jennifer! It is not easy to put your life on hold any time, but while everyone celebrates a New Year and all that it may hold, it is doubly hard!! Treatment is bad enough, but not knowing the outcome made me so sad…..so, like you…..I tried to take one day at a time. Easier said than done, right? I am praying that when your journey is done, you will be healthy, happy and celebrating surviving with your family!!! And them come to PA so we can celebrate with you!! Long-term health issues are hard….I still have them, but forgetting today’s troubles and dwelling on the littlest of blessings (I did it over and over and over…every day) helped me realize that I was in the best of hands….regardless my circumstances, and He was the Rock I leaned on!! I think of you daily and keep you in my prayers!! Love and HUGS!! Karen
I do kind of feel like life’s on hold, but never really realized it ’til you said that. 🙂 Love and Hugs to you to Karen!